"Why don't the elevators stay running?"
All things made by mankind break, busses, trains, planes, your car...

"Your service technician just left, and now the elevator is broken again"
Do you know exactly what is broken? No? Then let's take a look at it first, maybe it's something completely unrelated. We'll let you know exactly what it is.

"You guys just serviced my elevator last month, and now it's broken"
If I changed a flat tire on your car last month, and this month your engine blows up, that doesn't mean I did something wrong, does it? (The automotive analogy goes a long way to dissuade mypoic, distrustful building managers [I didn't say female!] who know nothing about mechanics and electrical issues from vaguely connecting unrelated events. Everyone knows at least a little smidgeon about cars)

"Why are these elevators so slow?"
All these elevators are actually running at design speed. The problem started when the architect intentionally under-elevated the building, to maximize the leasable floor space, and return on investment for the owner. This duplex should be a tri-plex. This four car group should be a six-car group. Etc.

"I have a maintenance contract, why do we have these problems?"
Some things can be prevented with lubrication, adjustment, checking vital metrics of performance, parts replacement, etc. But spontaneous component failures such as the failure of an intergrated circuit chip aren't within anyones control.

"Why are the elevators always broken?"
How old is your car? What would you expect if your car was 20 years old? (30? 40? etc)

"Why doesn't somebody fix them?"
All it takes is money. (Would they care to contribute?)

"Your tech doesn't seem like he knows what he is doing"
I have reviewed the issues, and the actions taken, and find that he acted properly in every case. It is more a matter of how he presents himself, and relates the issues verbally, rather than the course he took. (Then I go give the mechanic a "tune-up" of my own!)

"Seems like we're always having problems"
If they don't run too bad, you could say they are running at or better than national averages.
If below average, you might point out that this equipment was the low bid winner, and was not even top-of-the-line "back then", and now they are aging.

(OF course, all these comebacks are only to be said if you are DOING YOUR JOB, DOING YOUR BEST. Never use any of these comebacks to cover a lack of performance. They are just offered here for help in dealing with the public, and unreasonably critical people.

"Why are my elevators having so many problems?"
We will continue to do our best under the contract, but in time all things need replacement. No contract can stop the march of time. 2nd law of thermo dynamics, all things that have form, degrade into chaos. I'll have the office send you a modernization proposal.

"These elevators shouldn't break, if the preventive maintenance is being done"
This is an old school relay-logic controller. The relays are obsolete, and there are no direct replacements. Once the silver-cadmium plating is gone from the relay contacts, they go copper-to-copper, and pit quite easily. No amount of Preventive Maintenance can stop this, nor improve it. They are beyond their expected service life. They are soldered in, and subsitution of an equivalent is not covered by the contract, and extremely labor intensive, and expensive. Better to modernize.

"I got stuck in that one, I was so scared!" (also, "almost died, almost fell, fell to the bottom", etc)
Did you live?

"Oh my God, it's the elevator man! Is something really terribly wrong with the elevators?"
When you see a doctor, you don't automatically think someone died, do you? (Smile) Just keeping them running right!

"I'm scared of elevators, so I'm taking the stairs" (Said with as much drama as the speaker can muster)
Did you know there are ten times an many fatalities on stairs, than there are on elevators? Statistically, elevators are safer then stairs, and safer than walking.

"Is it safe to ride? I'm pertified of elevators"
Do you worry when you drive home? There are something close to 37,000 traffic fatalities annually in the USA, compared to just a few on elevators. You should really worry when you drive home. Of all forms of transportation, an elevator is the last one you need to worry about riding on.

"The elevator got stuck, and I'm scared of falling"
Elevators have like "100" brake pedals, or safety redundancies, but only one "go" pedal. If anything is the slightest bit amiss, it is built to STOP, more than it is built to run, to protect human life. Most of the time when an elevator gets stuck, it is only a slight anomally in a safety device, such a speck of dust on a contact. Compare this to your car, which is designed dimetrically opposite. Your car will let you drive forward over 100 mph, even if you have NO BRAKES! But do you worry when you drive your car? The elevator is infinitely safer than your car. If you don't worry about grabbing your keys and driving home, then you REALLY shouldn't worry about riding the elevator.

Standing in the elevator, a passenger comes in and says "Is it safe?"
Lady, if you see me taking the stairs, then it's time to worry!

Someone in the cab sees your uniform, says "Glad you're hear, in case we get stuck"
Uhm-hum, I can shriek like a bitch. (Help you scream, etc)

Looking around the cab, there are a few people, and one of them has food.
"Well, if we get stuck, at least we'll have something to eat!" Nervous awkward laughter...

Woman- "Hold the elevator, I'm coming, I'm coming!"
Oh, I thought you were just breathing heavy!

Pretty, fun-loving woman THAT YOU KNOW approaches, so hold the door for her-
Are you going down? We could go down together!